On the warm eve of Jack-O-Lantern………...
The day was just winding up with a dip in the air. The breeze hissing into my ears, the bite of the night giving me jitters. I am just a eight year old with bones and joints growing in an all-compassing direction.
I looked for my jungle green hooded jacket in my wardrobe. I found it on the last row, tucked away in the orderly way mom did at the end of last winter.
I looked out of the window to see Chris and Paul toss the coin to continue their never ending bet stories. Just then I heard the kitchen door creak. Mom, is that you? I pitched it out with a lot of desperation. The voice from the other side was more gruffly. "It's dad. Mom is coming too in a few minutes". Okay, I mellowed, I am coming down.
Sliding down the staircase, I landed just in time to bang into my dad. Hey Jose, dad squeaked, how have you been all day? Did you go out to play a bit? No dad, I was catching up on my science notes and self-pacing on my basketball skills.
Hmmm, that's good. But, it is a fine day to catch up with the neighbourhood boys. It's been awhile since I saw you interacting with them. Dad, I will meet them tonight anyway for the "Trick or Treat" muster. O yeah! So tell me what costume have you planned for yourself, dad punched? Grandma gave me an old one from the attic. She said it belonged to Uncle John when he was my age. That's sounds pretty set for you. Good luck my boy...
Just then mom barged in with loads of books and two bunches of keys and placed all of it with a clonk on the dining table.
Hello boys, what have you been upto? Dad, gave a warm hug with prolonged kiss on her forehead. Happy Weekend! They both screamed to the top of the ceiling. My lips curved up in empathy. Dad pulled me too, to unite in our traditional family group hug-tug.
It was mom, who first broke away and tossed the question, who is going to the garden to get the Pumpkin on the table? Dad was a bit spaced out suddenly. I am sure he had planned a self-igniting TV evening. This year too?, dad groaned.
Why not snapped mom? Well dad pitched, I thought Jose is over eight now and will find it interesting to hang around for trick or treat rather than carving a Cucurbita pepo (plant name which yields Pumpkin). Mom, was tapping her foot and I had figured out long back that it was a sign for dad to stop and just listen out to a plan mom had already figured out all perfect in her mind.
Dad sat down on the chair, and tapped the table and started musing his calm-change song (I call it that because he usually changes his thoughts after that). lol
Let me make some ham sandwiches and warm coffee, mom trudged. What do you want to sip, Jose?, she asked me. I will have some still lemonade without ice mom.
I did see you are wearing your jacket Jose. Hope you are not catching a sneeze?, mom enquired. No mom, I am okay, I blunted.
The evening snack packed a punch to all of us or was it mom's food? We discussed our day and came up to where we were. Mom, finally laid out the plan ahead for the evening. So boys, I think we are not just going to carve a pumpkin this Halloween, but also Jose is going to start to build on his culinary skills. Mom winked at me and notched up her nose. Dad did look surprised but, he well appreciated the idea.
So it was all set, dad and I will go to the garden to pick up a big great pumpkin. Come back and we three will get going into not just carving a "Jack-O-Lantern" but, also then I will be making an Halloween special "Cream of Pumpkin soup" under the guidance of my parents.
Just as we two were going to step out into the garden, mom called out, "And yes, I forgot to say this, Jose you will have to invite a friend of yours to join us for the soup you will spell up tonight". It pierced my ears and boggled my mind. Who will I invite? My mind was working like a bingo striking any name coming on my path.
Just then I got knocked down by the blessed pumpkin we planned to slay. Where are you lost, Jose boy? dad chuckled. I heard him saying, “Come, let's pull this mean big one out to our table”. We were inside the kitchen in a few minutes, thrusting out all the squash from inside, putting it into the mixer less the seeds which we had planned to dry up for roasting it later for a snack pack.
So, who are we expecting today, Oh, yeah, No. Don't tell us Jose. Let it be your secret and a surprise for us, gleamed mom. Dad, gave me a smile, saying you better go invite now and I will help get the pulp ready in the meantime and mom can get her artistic hands onto carving the pumpkin fellow.
Sure, dad, I said, trolling away to the porch. Once there I sat down again playing the mind bingo game. The boys in the neighbourhood came with their own gangs or groups. And I didn't want to bring friends of friends. Just someone, who we can share a quiet evening with. Just then, I heard the humming of songs from the front row houses. The boys in the neighbourhood called the row houses “Poor Man’s Zone”. The songs were surely being sung by Mrs. Daniel and her daughter Elizabeth. I had played with Elizabeth last summer when they had just moved into the neighbourhood. My mom unlike the other women in the high node Lincoln Street, had taken me with a welcome basket of goodies to make feel good the Daniels at their new abode. I had not gone again to play with her all this while. But, I liked her for the generous helping of the Carrot Chocolate cake she shared with me and also for being, hmm, who she was! Finally, the winner emerged from my bingo mind. It was Elizabeth!
Three taps at the door, and Mrs. Daniel opened up with her lovely smile. Jose, she shrilled, nice to see you boy, it's been sometime you hopped in. Elizabeth, look who is here she called out. Hello, Mrs. Daniel, Happy Halloween! I am here to invite Elizabeth for dinner with us. I will be making pumpkin soup for the evening with mom and dad helping me. Good gracious, exclaimed Mrs. Daniel. You are such a compassionate boy, just like your mother! Elizabeth, where are you sweetheart? I am coming mom, echoed her voice as she made sounds with her boots coming down the staircase.
Hi Jose ,she brightened up shaking my hand. How have you been all this while? I am good I responded briskly continuing, to ask, so will you like to join me and my family for a Halloween dinner? Her face broke into a comical laugh. I withdrew a bit, thinking maybe she will not be comfortable. "Ofcourse" came the answer. Just that you have never invited me home before. But, their is always a start, she said with a comical face which made me grin.
Mrs. Daniel smiled and said, so that's great kiddos. Good to grow your friendship skills too. Jose, I will drop her in another thirty minutes. Sure, I mumbled and waved my way back.
Back at my home kitchen, I played along with dad cooking some onions in a pan with two spoons of olive oil. We added the pumpkin pulp to it, then dashing it with some grounded peppercorns, clove, cinnamon and salt to taste. The small fresh cream carton from the fridge made its way onto the saucepan too. Mom added her magical sprinkle of parsley to make the soup healthier. The soup was all set to warm up our souls to the spooky night.
Just then the doorbell rang and my parents amused their way to open the door. The next I knew, we were chatting away at the couch about Elizabeth's school, her hobbies and more. My mom dances too, Elizabeth said excitedly. We go to dance classes together after school. That is so cool, said my mom. And I am so glad you were such a sport to make it here with such a last moment invite. We are working parents and it gets difficult to plan ahead because of our erratic schedules. It's okay Mrs. Victor. I do understand what you mean.
So kiddos, my dad got up saying, let's start our dinner. Mrs. Victor, he proclaimed, “may the grilled chicken be blessed”. I don't know about you kids but, I am going to stuff up tonight.
Starting with a tiny prayer, we binged on.
The soup was indeed good or was it the feeling of achievement?
Elizabeth had two helpings of it and it gave me more courage.
Mommies grilled chicken was out of the world as always.
Just as we were winding up, I heard Chris and Paul distinctively.
They were calling out for me.
Time for "Trick or Treat", I said.
Elizabeth didn't reply but, crooned,
“You already gave me a treat
with some tasty meat..
Your soup in a bowl, I emptied it all...
And so it calls for howl!!!” AAwwooooooooo
We all gave a hearty warm laugh together and lit the Jack-O-Lantern before leaving for just tricks.
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1. Parents show, Kids Learn
Mrs & Mr Victor make a happy & loving family and show that through the tradition of group hug-tug. Love is quite a big aspect which comes in small portions of actions and is understood and multiplied then. Rather than going for a "teach and follow" parenting style it's good to emotionally coach them through "showing and learning".
2. Responsible Child
Jose is a responsible child. He has completed his homework and did play on his own.
3. Social Interaction Skills
Mr. Victor does believe being outdoor in company with friends is a crucial aspect of growing up. He does express his wish to Jose.
4. Self-care through Mindfulness
Jose took care of himself by pulling out his jacket and wearing it. He knew he had to take prevention less he catches a cold. It also shows that he was completely aware of what he felt physically and mentally. That calls for great Mindfulness. Sometimes overlooked kids do become blank when it comes to expression of feelings (physically and mentally). Mrs. Victor did address Jose's decision to wear a jacket and asked if all was ok.
5. Ignite a thought, and the path is created
Parenting is all about mutual learning and not ruling. Authoritarian or Helicopter parenting styles can only lead to low self-esteem and over depended children. We are here to just create a few sparks in the child's path and they will create their world then. Mrs. Victor took the lead here of doing more than what's expected on a Halloween. She knew Jose was low in social interactions and wanted him to think on his own and arrive at a conclusion as to who will he invite for dinner.
6. Make & keep up your own family traditions
Make more of the festivals around us. In whatever time and in whatever ways that builds the conscious state of your family through good deeds like sharing, caring and more.
The "Joy of Giving" and "Thanksgiving" can come anytime of the year.
7. Children are noticing
Mr Victor was being appreciative of his wife even if he had other plans. Joes has been noticing all along for a considerable time now how both his parents argue. But, he also knows their alternative adjustments to each other. This is just one scenario. There may be others too.
8. Stop diving chores as per gender
Culinary skills belong to all genders. Our boys need to also learn to love the kitchen. Also there may be girls who do not like cooking. It's fair in a world were there are also men who don't like dusting.
9. Being generous
Mrs Victor and Elizabeth have already shown Joes how to be generous one, by being non-judgmental and pervasive in nature and two, by sharing is caring.
10. Compassion and Empathy
The most important take away from the story is that "Compassion is a very strong personality trait and is a by-product of empathy which is feeling what other's are feeling. Compassion is the action one takes to complete your feeling of empathy.
Copyrights: [The content here is copyrighted with Chirp, Chatter, Cheer, a creative platform which envisions to unlock your imagination power, build on your reflection and lead you on a path of self-discovery!!] ~ FB/Chirpchattercheer
About the Author: Kapithra Kannapiran is an Edupreneur, Creative Educator, Design Thinker and an Emotional Intelligence Coach. Based in Mumbai, India, she aspires to bring in paradigm shifts in thought-process and teaching & learning experiences among children and grown-ups. Through her work she focuses on aligning innovative practices with the right market & people collaborations. Her future interest lies in carving intricate paths of customized ideologies and enhance reflective educational experiences of children and all inclusive community.
